Episode Airing Number: 106
Episode Production Number: 97
Original Airdate: November 23, 2007
Season: 5
On DVD: "Season 5, Vol. 2", "Pest of the West"
On VHS: (none)
Aired With Episode: "20,000 Patties Under the Sea"
Running Time: 10:58
Storyboard Directors: Luke Brookshier and Nate Cash
Writers: Luke Brookshier, Nate Cash and Eric Shaw
Creative Director: Vincent Waller
Animation Director: Andrew Overtoom
Supervising Producer: Paul Tibbitt
In Brief: SpongeBob and Patrick battle each other over which is better, being dirty or being clean.
Story: SpongeBob and Patrick are at the mall shopping for shirts to show their friendship for each other. They get upset when the Best Friend arrows on their t-shirt start pointing at other people. They quickly rip them off and stomp on them, which gets them thrown out of the store. Outside of the mall theirs a group of people dressed in revolutionary war type uniforms. SpongeBob asks one of them where he and his friends got their uniforms. He explains to SpongeBob that they aren't his friends and he hates pretty much all of them but they get together every year to reenact the Battle of Bikini Bottom. SpongeBob had never heard of it so Patrick explains to him how it started. He goes on to tell him there were two groups of people: those who washed their hands (the softies) and those who didn't because they had more important things to do with their time.
Patrick tells SpongeBob he never washes his hands and never will and shows him how filthy they are. He then asks SpongeBob if it bothers him. He thinks back to when Patrick brings him ice cream and SpongeBob eats it out of his hand because he didn't have a cone. He also remembers when they went out to a restuarant to eat and Patrick picked something off of SpongeBob's tongue while he was talking. He then tells Patrick that yes, it does bother him that he doesn't wash his hands. SpongeBob and Patrick rip off the uniforms of the fish standing next to them. The whole group walks away angry.
Patrick, now dressed in uniform, watches for SpongeBob through his binoculars. SpongeBob sneaks up behind him and pretends to grab his nose. Patrick responds by grabbing his eyes and running with them. They turn out to be water squirters. Patrick then procedes to actually shoot his brain at SpongeBob, which gets juice all over him. He's not done yet though. Patrick shovels sand into SpongeBob's pants and gives him an extreme wedgie. To get revenge SpongeBob gives Patrick a pedicure and paints his toenails red. Patrick retaliates by breathing his nasty morning breath in his face, causing it to shrival up. SpongeBob tells Patrick he needs some oral hygeine and brushes his teeth for him, which doesn't make Patrick too happy. He grabs SpongeBob with his pit hair and shoves him under his arm part. SpongeBob solves this by spraying deodorant all over Patrick. Finally. Patrick decides to chase after SpongeBob while picking his nose.
They run to the Krusty Krab and Patrick chases SpongeBob into the kitchen. SpongeBob tells Mr. Krabs that Patrick is digging for gold. Mr. Krabs follows them, thinking he's talking about money, but quickly exits the kitchen when he realizes what SpongeBob really means. Patrick corners SpongeBob who throws an onion at him, getting in his eyes and causing him to cry. Patrick then puts Krabby Patties on his feet and wears them as socks. This angers SpongeBob so much that he sends Patrick through the roof and into a dumpster across the street. SpongeBob follows him with a bar of soap, eats it and shoots soap suds at him. Patrick picks up the dumpster and throws it at SpongeBob. This leaves Patrick squeaky clean and SpongeBob filthy. They are happy because they realize that they can spend a lot time doing what they love: getting filthy and getting clean. The guys from the battle reenactment approach SpongeBob and tell him the battle isn't over until they declare a winner. SpongeBob explains to them that cleanliness cannot exist without filthiness and vise versa. The guys realize reenacting wars is lame and decide to go and do some more manly things (like football, hockey. . .and knitting sweaters).
Song: (none)
Quotes:
SpongeBob: It's okay! We'll start a new life. Just you, me, and this can of disinfectant spray! *makes a foam house out of the spray* Come in! Would you like me to take your coat for you? *takes off the top layer of Patrick's skin, which is covered in filth, while the bottom layer is clean*
Patrick: *puts it back on* No, thank you! I happen to like my various smells and germs.
SpongeBob: Run, Mr. Krabs! Patrick is diggin' for gold!
Mr. Krabs: Gold?! Ar, har, har, har. *follows Patrick into the kitchen*
Squidward: *Mr. Krabs comes back out* Did you find any of Patrick's gold?
Mr. Krabs: He wasn't digging for any gold I was looking for.
Observations:
Getting Angry SpongeBob got very angry at Patrick for putting Krabby Patties on his feet, but yet in "Krabs a la Mode," everyone in the Krusty Krab was skating with patties on their feet and Patrick skated with Krabby Patties in "Wet Painters," but he did not get mad either of those times.
Patrick's Nose Patrick is able to produce a nose in this episode, but yet in "No Nose Knows" he has to get one surgically put on.
Unknown Fact A clip from "The Battle of Bikini Bottom" was used in a commercial for the video game Rayman Raving Rabbids.
Patrick's filth coat Things stuck to Patrick in his slime covering include a coin, a peanut, a toothbrush, a bandaid and a straw.